15 Tips on How to Learn to Love Yourself

It’s hard to put into words how important it is to love yourself. Loving yourself is the basis of a happy and positive life.

Learning to love yourself can be difficult – especially if your self-confidence is low at that moment. But that doesn’t mean it’s not worth it. With a little extra self-love, your whole life becomes more fun and effortless.

Learning to love yourself makes it easier to be more successful in your work, your relationships and your personal development. It feels like you can finally swim with the river instead of against it.

Because I also wish you a happy and positive life, I would like to share my way and useful tips with you.

And the great thing is, you don’t have to do anything special, you can just start right away. Right now!

How to Learn to Love Yourself 15 Tips For Developing Self Love

Now is the right time to start loving yourself.

Look in the mirror and really see who’s standing there. Look closely into your eyes, gauge the depth of your soul. You are so much more than just your physical appearance.

Accept the flaws, the fact that you are not perfect and accept with love that you are. No one is perfect in this world and no one ever will be. It’s okay not to be perfect. Stop criticizing yourself over every little detail. It’s a waste of time and energy to keep taking yourself down. It only increases negativity.

Focus on the good things in your life, your positive attributes and physical characteristics you are happy with. Build a foundation of positivity.

People always see what you see in you. So focus on the good and the beautiful. That is what you ultimately radiate to the world. That is the ‘picture’ what others see.

Be Positive

My whole personal development and building more self-confidence started with learning to think positively.

Your love for yourself grows when you start to be kind to yourself and think positively about yourself. The appreciation for yourself will then grow more and more.


Make a habit of regularly patting yourself on the back. Kindness is what makes a society. Be friendly, always.

Even for those who seem to deserve it the least, those are the people who need it the most.

So let us not take it for granted, but let us integrate it into our lives with love: gratitude for our positive qualities.

Because it’s easy to point out the things you don’t like about yourself. I think it’s easy, too. I know how to point them out. I find myself too lazy, too fat, too busy, too annoying etc.

But this is just one side of my personality. I also know that I am sweet, smart, handsome, funny, playful and sociable. And I know those things because other sweet people have told me that.

The point is, you underestimate yourself. And when you know that, then you know that maybe you shouldn’t wave away the positive things others say about you. But that you better embrace them.

Explore New Things on Your Own

Changing your eating habits, moving house or looking for another job: many people associate change with discomfort. However, by leaving everything as it is, you can get stuck: you don’t learn new things and others take a head start.

Moreover, life is associated with things that change: a resignation, the death of a loved one or the children who leave home. Those who learn to cope with small changes will be better prepared when big inevitable changes come their way.

Do: Focus on one small change at a time and choose a realistic time frame.


Traveling makes you a better person. Simply because traveling helps you develop faster and develop a milder view of the world.

I make a strong distinction between travel and holidays. Holidays are recovering from hard work. Travel is hard work.


Holidays are relaxing by the pool and book a well organized excursion. Traveling is an hour queuing at a bus terminal between two hundred Chinese and even more unreadable signs, hoping you walk away with the right bus ticket.

Both holidays and travel have their place. I love holidays, but I love traveling even more. Simply because a real trip offers you much more than just rest. It is a life-changing experience, something you carry in your heart forever.

A journey that helps you develop yourself, get to know yourself better and change your view of the world.


A journal – isn’t that especially for eight-year-old girls? No – and I’ll explain to you how keeping a journal can make your life much better.

I have to say I was pretty slow starting a journal. Not because I never wrote, but because I thought it was weird to write things that no one would read.

If no one’s allowed to read it – why bother?

For a lot of reasons, it turns out. Keeping a journal is one of the simplest things you can do to make your life more and more fun. My journal helps me develop more self-insight, experience more relaxation, reflect better, get things straightened out and develop peace of mind.

Keeping a journal is a great habit to support your happiness. Even if you don’t update it on a daily basis. I use my journal during periods when my head is a little fuller as a place for relaxing and clearing my mind.

I often take a moment to read my stories, and am amazed by the growth I have experienced. I then read how I was worried about things I don’t even think about anymore.

A journal helps you get to know yourself better. Immediately, while writing. But also by reading back. You see very clearly how you develop and how your ‘inner world’ changes.

Love yourself

Go stand in front of the mirror. And say to yourself, “You’re doing good, you take care of yourself as well as the others around you.”

Any luck? Fantastic. You’ve realized the importance of self-worth.

Difficult for you? Like for many others, it’s not always easy to say this to yourself. You can learn! Mental self-worth is so important in our environment. Go from fear of failure to self-confidence, from worrying to mental control, from stress to relaxation thanks to stress management and mental fitness.

Create a Vision Board

A vision board… What is it? Maybe you’ve heard of it because of the book ‘The Secret’ and maybe you’re already pursuing your big dream. What does a vision board have to do with that?

Dream Board

A Vision Board is a way to map out your dreams/goals by literally making a mood board of your goals. You grab a nice piece of cardboard and stick beautiful images on it that serve as a symbol for your goal.

It is a powerful addition to other activities you can do to achieve your dream, such as expressing your goal and taking concrete steps towards your goal.

Meditate Every Day

Developing a daily meditation habit is incredibly beneficial. But why exactly? And how do you get it done? Let’s talk about that.


A daily meditation habit lays the effortless foundation for your happiness, health, relationships and personal growth.

Developing a daily meditation habit is so beneficial- it brings you so many benefits with so little effort – that as far as I’m concerned, to establish this habit should be your next project.

Trust Your Gut Instincts

Listening to your feelings, your intuition, your subconscious, your heart – it means the same thing to most people. You want to include that gut feeling in your decisions. Because you notice that this gut feeling often knows exactly what needs to be done.

Not always of course. And that’s why it’s nice to be able to think – you’ve got that prefrontal cortex in your skull for a reason. But still – we tend to think too much.

Sometimes not making an effort is the best thing you can do. And so it’s often smart and effective to listen to your feelings and leave your thoughts for a while.

Take Time for Yourself

Without time for yourself, you’ll go crazy. We all need it, and we often find it hard to get it done.

Being alone is important. You also feel that in your head when you have had too little time for yourself.

What’s going on? Your development comes to a standstill. You become restless, insecure, less happy. You’re less authentic and not the best version of yourself. And if you’re not careful, something may snap.

People are great. Good relationships with your partner, your family and friends are vitally important. But so is time for yourself. Just as exercise and sleep are both necessary for a healthy body, social interaction and withdrawal keep your psyche in balance.

But finding time for yourself can be difficult. Especially if you work hard and maintain many social contacts at the same time.

Be Proud of Yourself

The way we think about ourselves has an enormous influence on the amount of self-confidence we radiate.

What do you think happens when we constantly say to ourselves, “well, what I’ve accomplished in life, that’s not worth mentioning” or always attribute our successes to other people? What do you think happens then?

If we do this, we weaken our self-image and strip ourselves of positive energy, which is at the expense of our self-confidence!


This is truly dangerous and can even lead to a feeling of inferiority towards the outside world.

People with little self-confidence do exactly that. They attribute their success to circumstances or other people, but not to themselves.

Thoughts like “other people are responsible for my success” or “I would never have made it alone”.

What also often happens is that these people do not accept their success and achievements in the form of “well, that was nothing or anyone else could have done the same”.

Do you see what catastrophic consequences an institution like this can potentially have?

So now it’s high time to eliminate these limiting ideas and make it clear to yourself that you’ve done enough to be publicly proud of!

Practice Forgiveness

You may have made “mistakes” in the past. Mistakes that you blame on yourself and still carry with you. You are doing yourself a disservice. It can make you feel quite ‘inferior’ to others. Not necessary.

Be happy with the things you’re happy with. Don’t focus your attention on what you don’t like about yourself. Focus on the qualities that help you love yourself.

It’ s easy.

Learn to Say No

In life we have to learn to understand others and sometimes adapt to others. We have to be flexible. However, there are people who for various reasons (such as a lack of self-esteem and the feeling that they are not worthy of love if they don’t live up to expectations) concede so much that they lose themselves. Those people need to learn to say no.

While offering a helping hand and being generous to others are positive things and offer you many benefits, it is also important to remember that YOU are your first priority. It is good to be flexible, but not to do everything to please others and put their needs above yours.

Get Out of Your Comfort Zone

Are you familiar with your comfort zone? It’s that spot you’re probably in right now. Your comfort zone is your mental picture of what you can and cannot do.

comfort zone

Your comfort zone is that place where you feel comfortable and safe. You leave your comfort zone as soon as you suddenly find yourself in situations that you have never experienced before and of which you don’t know whether you can do it or not.

Everything you’ve never done or experienced before is potentially outside your comfort zone. How difficult it can sometimes be to leave your comfort zone, just outside the comfort zone are the real rewards in life. Those who have the courage to challenge themselves and push their limits will really discover what life has to offer.

By stopping yourself from leaving your comfort zone, you prevent yourself from growing. You really grow by constantly trying new things, and constantly pushing your limits. When you leave your comfort zone, you try to prove to yourself what you can do.

List the Positive Traits of a Friend

It’s not always easy to be a good friend, but it’s worth investing in a lasting friendship. As the years go by, some people will stay by your side, but others won’t, and you will realize that any friendship you keep is priceless. To have a good friend, you have to be one yourself, of course.


List the positive traits of a friend and exchange notes. This can really help boost your self-esteem and offers you possibilities to grow into a better person.

Be Childlike

It’s not bad to be childlike sometimes. We can’t love ourselves or each other when we’ve lost our inner child.

Your Inner Child is the echo of the child you once were. We each have our own history and we have all been influenced by our environment, events and the significant people around us. Our inner child has stored those memories, and their impact upon us.


You may have heard the term ‘inner child’ and thought it was just another bit of ‘psycho-babble’ – even though the term has been around for many years now.

Your Inner Child is the echo of the child you once were.

We each have our own history and we have all been influenced by our environment, events and the significant people around us. Our inner child has stored those memories, and their impact upon us.

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